When “Shame” is Weaponized: Don’t Let it Push You to Succumb to Tyranny

In the myriads of human interactions, few things cut as profoundly as “shame” in African society. It’s a tool a righteous person can wield for justice, or an evil person can manipulate for cruelty. I have seen firsthand how Fatima Jabbie Bio, the First Lady of Sierra Leone, has weaponized shame against her critics. My story isn’t just about me; it’s a cautionary account for everyone about the dangers of succumbing to such cruel manipulation of shame.

Recently, I understood why Mrs. Bio recruited the lowest caliber and youngest individuals from my mother’s family to act as her pawns. She figured if little boys from my family insulted me, it would put me in “shame.” Also, the boys she recruited are the sons of my mother’s biological brother (both deceased).

This revelation became more apparent when one of Mrs. Bio’s minions recently sent me a voicemail threatening to “shame” me. And he added that he knows I would not want him to “blast” my mother, which means insult my mother, a practice known as “Mammy cuss” in Sierra Leone. Mammy cuss is when one person calls out the female anatomy of another person’s mother or says demeaning things about another person’s mother. It is considered the highest form of insult, particularly when done by a younger person to an older person. The mother is also targeted because our mothers are sacred and most revered. Ironically, mammy cuss is also very common in Sierra Leonean society.

That little boy promising to dedicate himself to rain profanity at my mother, me, and other female members of my family as a way to “shame” me and my family was a stark reminder of an interview where Mrs. Bio mentioned using “naming and shaming” as her strategy against rape in Sierra Leone. This method is a twisted tool for her vendetta against me for authoring a book about her corruption as First Lady.

I was astounded by the absurdity when that little boy stated his intention to “shame” me and my family. Here is a boy I fed, schooled, and clothed, a mere puppet of Mrs. Bio, believing he had the power to degrade me with empty words and fabrications. Even though I am not the one acting as First Lady, whose political and financial criminality is well documented in Sierra Leone. It is not my mother whose trip to perform hajj was made possible with a stolen government scholarship used by this same criminal first lady as payment to her thugs.

So, how can Mrs. Bio and her thugs wield mammy cuss as shame against me? Why do they believe that invectives lashed at my mother and I could tarnish my family’s honor?  Who is their audience? Why would anyone born of a woman think they can insult another’s mother and their own mother will be left unscathed? Ar be moomoo?

Is it that somehow, Mrs. Bio and her thugs came into this world without birthmothers?

Here’s the crux of my message to those facing similar tyrannies by Mrs. Bio and other crooked politicians: Guard your actions and behavior. Shame can only stick if there is truth in the accusations. People who see you through the lens of lies propagated about you are not worth your time. Mrs. Bio, with her well-documented political and financial transgressions in Sierra Leone, embodies the very shame she tries to cast on others. Don’t let baseless insults and fabrications affect you. Stand firm in your truth; you will remain impervious to their attempts to “shame” you.

Remember, shame is a mirror. It reflects the nature of the person casting it and using it as a weapon. When you stand up for the truth, no amount of defamatory speech can indeed tarnish you. Those who wield shame as a weapon against others only expose their own moral failings.

In the battle for justice, truth and honor are your shields. No matter how vicious the attacks are, they will falter against the fortress of your truthfulness. So, stand tall and let the shameless drown in the shame of their own making.

As for mammy cuss, never let them get away with it. It is easily accessible to all and sundry.